StixxFixx

New year’s here again…damn, time do flies. everything seems to go faster. to all my friends…new and old…Happy New Year to all…!!! dont really have anything much to say. i just got bored i guess. friends that i used to hang out with…most of ‘em got married…so, i guess they more likely to “hang out” with their wives rather than me. and sH*t, i do envy them.

What’ve i achieved this year?? hrmmm…let’s see…won first place in a battle of the bands contest…manage to get Exorage(my other band) exposed in ROTTW…got a chance to play in JB…got to play one of the best gigs ShockSystem(my band) have ever played. and i guess…there are few more…well, have to make more achievements in this brand new year.

-stixx, fixxing out!-

wow…i must say…it’s been awhile since i wrote anything in my blog. lot of things have been going on lately….and i really do mean A LOT. few of the reasons why i didnt write for last few months…, i don’t have internet access anymore…don’t have the time to go to cybercafe, and of course…as usual…don’t know/don’t feel like writing.

the fasting months is great…manage to get thru it with no “problems” like 2 yrs past. gained new friends…and maybe lost a few. not that i want to…but…i don’t know how to explain it myself. for one moment u’re friends with this person…and suddenly…this person[s] just went silent. what is wrong? am i to blame?? was it something i did or didn’t do?? what? what? what?!

and other than that…few of my friends got engaged, got married, gonna get married…expecting parents…had a baby…filing for divorce….LOTs of things going on man…! oh yeah and don’t forget the ones that got themselves new girlfriend/boyfriend. lucky for them…hate to admit it…but to a certain point…i do envy them.

ok….what else….what else….hurmmm…can’t think much of anything rite now…i guess have to update some other time…till then…

- stixx, fixxing out! -

i try to play with fire

in the end i got burned

i try to play in the water

in the end i drowned

i try to play with the wind

in the end i got blown away

i try to play with earth

in the end i got suck into a quicksand

- stixx, fixxing out! -

I wrote her off for the tenth time today
And practice all the things I would say
But she came over
I lost my nerve
I took her back and made her dessert

Now I know I’m being used
That’s okay man cause I like the abuse
I know she’s playing with me
That’s okay cause I got no self esteem

We make plans to go out at night
I wait till 2 then I turn out the lights
All this rejection’s got me so low
If she keeps it up I just might tell her no

Chorus
When she’s saying all that she wants only me
Then I wonder why she sleeps with my friends
When she’s saying that I’m like a disease
Then I wonder how much more I can spend
Well I guess I should speak up for myself
But I really think it’s better this way
The more you suffer
The more it shows you really care
Right?

Now I’ll relate this little bit
That happens more than I’d like to admit
Late at night she knocks on my door
Drunk again and looking to score

Now I know I should say no
But that’s kind of hard when she’s ready to go
I may be dumb
But I’m not a dweeb
I’m just a sucker with no self esteem

:- Self Esteem - The Offsprings

- stixx, fixxing out! -

16th Feb 2008 :- the battle started around 10:45am, with 19 bands total. performing their best to achieve greatness. exorage, the only 3 piece band, was the 4th band to perform. we’re a nervous wreck, i was a nervous wreck. my fingers were actually shaking while playing thru the notes. we played Just by Radiohead, the crowd was very kind, very kind indeed.

the prelimenary ended. the organizers announced the bands that made it. 12 bands, although we thought we didnt make it, but when Exorage was announced…damn, we’re so relieved.

the finals. we played third, 2 songs :- New Exit(original) , Just(cover). less nervous now…but still a bit shaky, because this time, the place was packed like sardines in a can. the other bands are so freakin’ly amazing, we knew we can never make it, even in the top 5. congratulations to The Shawns (friends of ours), for winning 1st place in the battle plus they also won for the best guitarist, best bassist and best vocal performance. then Hujan came up on stage as the guest artist for that night. for us the battle ends there, but only for that battle, as there will be others. And Exorage will be ready.

- stixx, fixxing out! -

as i watch the changing weather
from the window of my cell
may be clear outside
but inside me it’s raining blood

just what is there to do
with someone and there is only me
to hold there’s nobody
to embrace there’s no one

the heart is void
is it not? will it be?
half empty it may be
half full? not likely

the weather’s changing
here comes the rain
as if nature’s wept with me
she felt the melancholy

once reality escapes me
the fantasy grabs a hold of me
the nightmares choking me
now life itself comforts me

- stixx, fixxing out! -

demmit…! it’s 2008 already…!? this is my first blog for the year 2008. 3 nu years, the normal nu year, followed by awwal muharram and finally chinese nu year. to me…nothing much has happen. nothing interesting. again, nothing interesting…huhuhu….am i a boring person living a boring life?? maybe…i dunno lah. but me and a couple of friends have made up a few plans or targets for 2008.

one of ‘em would be to record (at least) proper demo for our new band Exorage. try to get a chance to perform in a gig/concert…on fact we’re gonna be performing at a battle of the bands competition in UKM…hey, it’s a start :P.

and there’s this plan of going on a vacation either with some friends or officemates…or maybe relatives. i’m looking forward for the first two…but to go with relatives…?? weelll…i’m not into it that much.

oh yeah…this year…there’ll be a lot of weddings to attend to. heh….friends here and there are getting hitched. good for them…and a little bit of good for me…weddings usually means…free food!!! and also can be a place to "wash our eyes" lah..!:P. but then again…there’s one thing that i just can’t stand when going to weddings…it’s THE QUESTION…!! "Ko bila lagi?"…aiyooo…! please la…i’ll get married when i got the right girl and the most important thing…the right amount of money!!! don’t worry, ada rezeki…sampai la kad jemputan kawen tu.. :P.

bcoz of this is my first blog for 2008, i would also like to thank…everyone who took sometime to read thru my crappy blog…seriously i never thought that anyone would want to read this blog. again, thanx…and may this year will be a great year for all of us…

- stixx, fixxing out! - 

there’s a story of a man,
when long ago he’s head over heels,
over a girl, so beautiful, alluring,
a face of angel and stars for eyes,
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nothing except her, in his mind,
nothing but her, in his heart,
nothing he wouldn’t do for her,
he would give his all just for her,
but she never knew, as he just wouldn’t dare,
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to tell her what she means to him,
to tell her how much he adores her,
to tell her his heart skips everytime near her,
to tell her, more than life itself, he loves her,
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that was years ago,
when they used to be close,
now those days are gone,
as if she never knew him before,
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he asked himself why,
blame himself for didn’t even try,
afraid she can never accept what he’s going to say,
fearing that she can never accept him for saying it,
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in time, people change, that’s how the saying goes,
it’s hard for him to accept that fact,
let alone, live on in this life with a scar,
just watch her, admire her, from afar…

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- stixx, fixxing out! -

the rain is pouring down

as she lay alone on her bed

thinking what would happen

to all the things in her head

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she can’t decide on

what to do or what to wear

as she take a look in the closet

she can never choose, she can’t compare

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and old sweater’s hanging there

gives her warmth and comfort

on the otherside, there’s the evening dress

makes her feel beautiful and elegent

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but there’s always another option

it’s always her choice, her decision

throw away the dress, burn the sweater

just go out and find a new gear

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- stixx, fixxing out! -

to be in front of you

although i’m somewhat behind the line

it’s a bliss i never want to miss

it’s the energy that i can never resist

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with your hands lifted in the air

the waves of you, welcomes me

appreciate the support

so i thank you

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with you say it with me

knowing every word i say

screaming at the top of ur lungs

understand every word we say

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i want to be there again

it’s the only time i feel so alive

the one feeling that can never be replaced

day by day i longing for the embrace

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- stixx, fixxing out! -